Payment of Existence

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consortium: we now call forth the firstborn of the shattering, exdeth:

judgement: exdeth, do you know why they call you the firstborn of the shattering?

exdeth: i have scattered the fragments of izen’s twelve and hidden them where i could not find them.

judgement: how is it that you were able to scatter the twelve in the first place?

exdeth: i have been given direct power by izen as i was his first creation.

judgement: were you not part of the twelve yourself?

exdeth: in izen’s wisdom he formed the twelve after his last revelation to me.

judgement: what was his last revelation?

exdeth: he has revealed to me the name of summons, his name of existence.

judgement: what does knowing the name of summons do?

exdeth: it calls forth great understanding about the true nature of izen.

judgement: do you understand the true nature of izen?

exdeth: there is too much to know, that you can know, of which i can only interpret a part.

judgement: then how do you interpret izen against the backdrop of the shattering?

exdeth: izen was compelled to create this world, including everything in it, but his motivations exist in another plane.

judgement: how do you explain this other plane?

exdeth: izen exists of his own will yet he is ruled by other wills.

judgement: what do you know of these other wills?

exdeth: they are beings who codify themselves, not unlike our golem constructs. these beings cannot be sensed – they can only be experienced.

judgement: so you are saying that izen is being manipulated by these other wills.

exdeth: i am saying that izen has many sides, some can be manipulated, some cannot.

judgement: tell us more about his sides.

exdeth: he has three main sides: the interna, the externa, and the superna.
he is connected to this world through the interna and the externa.
his interna is related to this shattering’s lifeline. the interna is what powers the twelve. i have already proven that the twelve can be scattered and hidden where it cannot be found…

judgement: that remains to be seen. so how about the externa?

exdeth: the externa is indestructible material from the izenplane. as his first creation izen has made sure i will be remembered here for all eternal, though i have once sought to destroy all trace of his existence in this plane.

judgement: what made you seek destruction of such a powerful being, when you yourself are his creation as you say?

exdeth: i was motivated by the wisdom, he granted me power to execute whatever i desire. i had realized that such a being cannot control his creations by the use of the law of free will alone. he cannot act harshly when necessary because he loves his creations so much. creatures must succumb to their own time and place in order to have a meaningful existence. it was by defeating such a great enemy that i was able to experience what is called defeat. therefore i am more of the first victim amongst his creation, the first to fall, the first loser of all.

judgement: why would you want to become a loser when you could have cooperated with him and become the greatest of all?

exdeth: i was created in his image yet i was not like him. i already knew i could have everything yet i could never be like him. at first it was pride that wanted me to dare to be more like izen, now i realize it is an inner sense of lack that i was full of that wouldnt go away that fueled my fire to be more like that great. by erasing him from the records, and shattering the twelve, i have accomplished transcendence. now what you see before you is a figure that might resemble izen, as i never really destroyed his existence, i made it into my own way of life. besides, his superna can never be destroyed. the stuff of superna is his life, my life, and yours. it is not a matter of faith, because i have scattered the twelve to where it cannot be found by me, since it is in you. once you’ve found the meaning of the twelve for yourself, then you will have reached your final day of judgement just like me, after which your trials are over and you will have your records written by karma, keeper of fate.

judgement: how can you be so sure?

exdeth: because i know izen’s name of existence.

judgement: will you tell us that name of existence?

exdeth: he is MeARThaIN.

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